Gory & Gruesome Things

Now that this blog is private, I can share all the gory and gruesome things I have longed to share! Like pictures of my knee! Yes, as insinuated by the previously posted pictures, I got in a bit of a motorcycle accident.

Gloria and I were leaving a friend's house in a remote part of town, a part of town known for vicious dogs and dark roads. We were chased down one of the dark roads by five of the vicious dogs (two from the front, three from the back), slid out on rocks and plowed into the ground.

I believe my sense of duty to protect Gloria and my bike led to me stay planted on the bike, instead of flying off as expected. Hence, the left side of my body (namely me blasted knee), took one for the team and absorbed the impact of the bike + Gloria + me, which equals approximately three metric tons. And by my knee "absorbing the impact", I mean, "it exploded".

But they stitched Humpty Dumpty back together again!

My elbow was not so lucky. It fact, it was so upset, 

IT GREW A SECOND ELBOW.

I'm pretty sure my face here says it all. It turns out the "doctor" who "operated" on me knee was actually a pediatrician. Not that there's anything wrong with that. But when you've got exposed bones and bleeding wounds, "pediatrician" is not the first thing that comes to mind.

A month has passed; after three weeks in bed, out of the ocean and out of my mind, I'm back on my motorcycle and back in the sea. I have only a newfound dread of dogs and fondness for canine revenge fantasies. Poisoned pork chops, anyone? 

Everyone from the congregation took great care of me; supplying me with a steady stream of meals and encouragement. Most of my Bible studies came to visit me, that was a table turner. Everyone who looked at my knee in it's pre-healed state would gasp, or dry heave, and then say "So....are you going to go home?" And I would reply to them with the famous Spanish expression which, when translated, means, "Better is it for a juicy knee to dwell in peace than in the land of your forefathers*."

Aside from this, things are good here. Very good. Splendid, in fact. At least today they are. Tomorrow might be horrid. You really never know. The best thing to do is to enjoy the moments of relative happiness and mobility we have today. So flex those knees, amigos, and appreciate those elbows. You never know when they may decided to explode, or spawn.

*This is not actually a famous Spanish expression. Yet.